


It'll Be Okay

by OurArtificialWorld



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Break Up, Depression, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Heartbreak, Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Miscommunication, Moving On, POV Lance (Voltron), Past Relationship(s), Post-Break Up, References to Depression, Tea, Teenagers, such dumb dumb teenagers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-04
Updated: 2018-07-04
Packaged: 2019-06-05 06:01:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15164207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OurArtificialWorld/pseuds/OurArtificialWorld
Summary: He was tired, not like tired as in sleepy tired, but the tired when you want to lay down and just disappear. The tired where everything's a blur, where being alone keeps those nostalgic feelings awake. Where the very being of you is just sucked from you when you go turn on a simple lamp.“I’ve been thinking lately”Sure, he was still able to laugh and hang out with friends. He was just like his regular old self. He was the old loving and flirty Lance even after all of this going on with him and Keith, nothing changed the way he acted towards his friends.“I think we should end this”But when he was alone was a different story. When the thoughts circulated through his head. They would bombard him when he least expected it. Studying, working, or even just trying to sleep. Thoughts of Keith would rush through his mind and he would have to step away from what he was doing and curl up in a ball and hope it would just pass.“I just don’t have any feelings for you anymore”





	It'll Be Okay

_**Y’all got tea? Cause that’s literally what the texts are spilling.** _

-

Sun, April 8, 20XX 6:57 AM 

 

**6:57 AM - You: I'm not going to be apart of your life anymore that's a fact. You don't have to worry about a thing. I'm sorry I ruined us. I'm sorry I ruined you. I'm sorry I ruined everything. But sorry isn't going to cut it so I'll just cut myself out of the picture. But please, if there's anything that came out of this, then please don't regret the good times we had. Not because of me but so you don't have to regret so much of your choices. I'm grateful for you changing me so much to the point that I wanted to become a better person because of it. I'm sorry I made that mistake before I realized that. Don't hate yourself for any of this. It was my doing so I'm carrying the burden. I'll leave you be now, forever.**

 

**2:04 PM - Keith: I want my jacket back.**

 

**2:31 PM - You: I'm going to be out of town this week. I can give it to you next week though, is that okay?**

 

**2:32 PM - Keith: Yeah, can you also give me my virginity back?**

 

_Hesitance_

 

Wed, May 9, 20XX 12:38 AM 

 

It was raining. Lance could see it was getting harder by the hour.

 

Wearing a blue hoodie that was way too big his size. Sitting criss cross on the hard concrete floor he was holding a sketchbook and mechanical pencil, practicing his sketches. They weren’t perfect but it was good enough to him. Wearing those black socks his mom gave him a while ago for christmas and some baggy pants Hunk gave him when he stayed the night at his house one time, they were a bit big but in a comfy and nice way.

 

He looked at the rain directly outside the dry porch, so simple how a roof of a porch kept the millions of tears in the sky from falling near his vicinity. It was funny, yet so poetic to him somehow in his head.

 

He wanted to reach out, touch those droplets, watch them drizzle down his hand. Yet he couldn’t, he didn't want to make himself a mess. Knowing he would be caught up in the droplets and jump into the rainstorm that was so alluring.

 

So he imagined it.

 

Maybe he could run around? Getting himself dripping wet, proud and laughing of all of this rain. Happiness oozing from his every being, glowing more and more as every droplet hit him. Ending up becoming soaked and feeling content. Standing in the middle of it all with a big smile, looking up and all of this calming and wonderful rain soothing him.

 

But that wasn’t the case.

 

He looked fondly at the storm that was only a few inches from him, but never with a smile or maybe a glimmer of content. It was merely empty. That was how it felt. Nothing to feel, yet he felt like a hurricane. He was calm but nowhere near relaxation.

 

-

 

Sat, March 17, 20XX 3:45 PM 

 

_“Keith come on, it’s raining so hard! I wanna get out there before it gets any lighter!”_

 

_Keith sighed and watched Lance jump more and more animated, he was almost finished tying his shoe when the brown haired boy said those words with such happiness. Keith looked up at him, finally finished with his small mission and stood up in front of the ball of happiness._

 

_“If we get sick, I’m blaming you,” he said lovingly with a sparkle in his eye, Lance merely grinned at him with his tongue sticking out between his teeth. (Keith would always say that grin was the cutest thing about him.) The taller of the two pulled the other's hand towards the door, excitement glowing all over his face as he opened to see the outside pouring with a storm._

 

_Lance ran past the empty porch and jumped into the pouring rain with laughter echoing through the area. Keith could only watch with adoration, watching the other play in the rain._

 

_“Well come on you weirdo! There’s only so much time before it becomes sunny,” the taller of the duo announced with a smile plastered onto his face. Keith could only smile and nod as he took steps into the pouring water that was now starting to blend into his clothes._

 

_Lance walked forward to him with a laugh, watching the smaller ones hair become more flat than it was before though he couldn’t talk much as his hair started to weigh down and take the form of something straight and long than the regular curls he had._

 

_“You look like a dork,” Keith simply said with a loving smile as he took the palm of the other's hand._

 

_Lance simply called him a dork back as a reply, accepting the grip of the other's hand. A little smirk was given to the smaller one before he twirled Keith around in glee and Lance’s hand held raised above his head in a dancing motion._

 

_Knowing where his partner was coming from, Keith grabbed Lance’s waist with his other hand and pulled him closer. Daring as it was - making both of them blush like idiots - they couldn’t help but hold in their giggles as they swayed side by side in that stance._

 

_They didn’t need real music, it was like the rain was their symphony that played entirely for them. All the two needed was the smiles, the laughter, and the soaked clothes they wore._

 

_They danced like that all the way till the sun shine, and even still after that - they stood there, hugging and talking the hours away, not giving a care in the world about what was around them. Just knowing that in that moment with each other was fulfilling for them enough._

 

_Though when they both came to school sick with running noses, Their parents weren’t to happy about it. Yet if you asked the both of them to this day if they would take back that time, they would decline. Keith even said that during the next rainstorm, they promised to do it again._

 

_-_

 

Guess they were both promise breakers.

 

He had enough, Lance didn’t want to be remembering open wounds this early, it was too much for him right now. He stood up with his sketchbook in hand and went inside.

 

His parents were absent from the house a lot more lately because of how their jobs got more busier lately. They were getting more recognition and they felt more happier when they had more money to use so Lance didn’t mind it all that much. His siblings getting more busy with extracurriculars and friends. They seemed happy, how could Lance stop them from that? Yet there was still that gaping hole in his stomach that just kept growing every time he saw the house so empty and dull.

 

He was tired, not like tired as in sleepy tired, but the tired when you want to lay down and just disappear. The tired where everything's a blur, where being alone keeps those nostalgic feelings awake. Where the very being of you is just sucked from you when you go turn on a simple lamp.

 

_“I’ve been thinking lately”_

 

Sure, he was still able to laugh and hang out with friends. He was just like his regular old self. He was the old loving and flirty Lance even after all of this going on with him and Keith, nothing changed the way he acted towards his friends.

 

_“I think we should end this”_

 

But when he was alone was a different story. When the thoughts circulated through his head. They would bombard him when he least expected it. Studying, working, or even just trying to sleep. Thoughts of Keith would rush through his mind and he would have to step away from what he was doing and curl up in a ball and hope it would just pass.

 

_“I just don’t have any feelings for you anymore”_

 

‘It’s just a highschool relationship Lance, get over yourself,’ he would tell himself day and night. He knew this feeling would be temporary. Every single day he prayed the tears would just stop just like the messages Keith sent him.

 

He prayed for the feelings to just leave so easily like how Keith did, but they just got worse. Hours of mourning turned to days of sorrow. Weekends of hanging with friends shifted to working and lying in bed. Restless nights became more frequent. Coffee and Monster became his addicting friend.

 

Lance sighed from all the heavy thoughts and went and sat on his bed, scrolling through his phone messages. A few from Hunk and Pidge, a couple in a group chat (though he probably guessed it was just a bunch of memes), and one from Shiro.

 

**5:36 pm - Hunk: Hey I know you’ve been wanting to catch up on studies lately but we haven’t hung out together in a while! Maybe you, me and Pidge could have some chill group time? Idk I miss you man! <3 **

 

He smiled at the text message he had sent and quickly started tapping on his phone trying to find the right words before texting them out.

 

**5:57 pm - You: i miss u too! and don’t worry i think im almost to a point where im satisfied with my work but if you guys wanna come hang out sometime by all means the house is open~ mom and dad are busy lately anyways so free house <3 <3**

 

And within only a few minutes of answering a reply came back.

 

**6:00 pm - Hunk: Oh nice!!! Well today's Wednesday, sooooo how bout this Friday? After we’re done ‘chilling’ we can bake! I’ve been reading these recipes lately online and now I’ve been craaaavvvviiinnngggg some aesthetic cute but delicious looking food, I want them so bad. <3 <3 <3**

  
**8:01 pm - You: sounds like a plan id love to! <3 <3 <3 <3**

 **  
** **8:01 pm - Hunk: Neato burrito! Okay moms calling me for dinner I'll see you tomorrow Lance! <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3**

 **  
** **8:02 pm - You: lol night Hunk**

 **  
** Lance stood up, tired enough he just wanted to get some kind of snack in the kitchen and not worry about the other texts. Walking to the kitchen and found some chips in the pantry.

  
_"Do you ever eat anything other than snacks and coffee?"_

  
Grabbing them and heading back into his room, closing to door and turning off the light before falling back into his bed.

  
Covering himself in his blankets and grabbing his phone, looking at posts from a random forum to another about the stupid things he found interesting, eating the big bag of chips beside him in the dark room that was surrounding him. Still ignoring the other texts that were sent to him just because he found it tiring to answer the texts. They didn't seem too important so he would just reply to them tomorrow morning.

  
_"You always get upset when I barely text you but you never texting back either. This isn't boyfriend goals you know."_

 _  
_ Nights were usually like this when he finished his homework at school or on break in work. Nothing too much, he would just browse the internet till he found it was 3 am and then try to find the strength in himself to fall asleep. Some nights were easier than others and other times his anxiety and thoughts wouldn't be so easy to get rid of and it would be a whole night of him, restless yet exhausted to hell.

  
_"Maybe you need to take a break from working so harshly Lance, I'm afraid you'll get sick babe. Can you please just take care of yourself? For me?"_

  
This was normal.

  
He was still normal.

  
  
Thurs, May 10, 20XX 5:01 AM 

 

  
It was 5am when Lance woke up, not exactly surprising because he passed out at midnight, just getting 4 hours of sleep is enough to get him through the day so he was fine.

  
He sat up, bed head everywhere, drool on his face, and uncomfortable set of eyes because he forgot to take out his contacts before he slept again. He yawned and tossed and turned for a bit after checking his phone to see the time and decided it was time to get ready.

  
The brown haired boy sighed as he got out of bed, taking his phone with him and wobbling to the bathroom still half-asleep and every bone in his body screaming to get back in bed but he knew if he rested his eyes again he would never wake up for another 7 years.

  
He stood, looking tiredly in the mirror at the mess of himself. A blank expression and as dull as a foggy afternoon.

  
_"You always look so cute with your bed head"_

  
He ran his fingers through his hair to mess with it and play for a few seconds before checking his face to see any blackheads that might have shown on his freckled face. Ready to pop them if he saw that they were ready. None per usual though, but he was always ready to check.

  
_"How do you always have such a naturally acne-free face? It's amazing"_

  
Sighing again he turned on the water and began taking off his clothes. Checking to see if the water was warm enough to get in and soothe him into content. He took a step in and for a bit, smiling softly at the warmth it gave his bare body.

 _  
_ _"I always like cold showers. Don't give me that look I think they wake you up and give you more energy."_

  
After a couple of minutes of cleaning the main parts of his body and not wanting to be in the shower anymore before his thoughts became too much to handle he finished up and got out, getting ready and putting on his uniform before heading out of his room, grabbing his phone and backpack to make sure he would be ready when getting to leave.

  
_It's going to take a while before I get used to this_

 

Making some coffee while already in the deep thought he tried avoiding. Ignoring the texts on his phone again. Really just not in the mood to text anyone right away. He just wanted to finish making this coffee then leave and get to the bus.

  
_His kisses, his laughs, the way he would hold me like nothing was wrong. It's all gone now._

  
He continued on like that. Silently drinking his coffee and then heading out to school before it got any later.

 

Stepping onto the bus with seconds to spare. Usually he would be sitting with Pidge or Keith in the very back but seeing Keith’s red jacket from the very back of the bus made him almost hurl his breakfast and decided the empty seats in the middle were Lance’s best bet.

 

He stuck his headphones in almost full blast and just rest his legs on the rest his bus seat as a ‘fuck off I don’t want a seat buddy’ sign. Resting his head on the window with exhaustion conversing through his whole body. Usually when doing things like this his anxiety would be through the roof.

 

_What if the people around me can hear my music?_

 

_Putting my feet up will only make others think I’m a selfish asshole won’t they?_

 

In the end though, he just didn’t give a shit. Lance’s pain and unsettled heartbreak was more important than the rest of these assholes who probably don’t even want to be here. He just wanted to be alone with his thoughts and just take the time to breath from this inner war of new depression in his mind.

 

Honestly he knew putting his own personal playlist to play for himself to deal with his recent romantic break up would literally only make it worse. He pulled out his phone and thought about what he wanted to listen to.

 

_Lance don't do it you're better than this_

 

He opened his spotify and looked through the trending playlists.

 

_If you listen to any of this you're going to have a panic attack_

 

He tapped the “Breakup :(“ playlist.

 

_LANCE_

 

He put his music on blast and pressed shuffle. Putting the phone back in his hoodie pocket and just closed his eyes in hope of maybe being able to deal with this a little bit better if he just vented it out through listening to music.

 

Listening to the lyrics, the sad lullabies, the soft beat it played, the continuous nostalgic feelings it brought, it made him heavy. Lance was in pain, physically and mentally. The stabbing feeling in his chest. The way his thoughts told him the negative of every situation from now on, just like before he met _him_.

 

He was tired… so very tired.

 

This is going to be okay.

  
He is going to be okay.

  
_It'll be okay._ _  
_ -

**Author's Note:**

> And roooolll credits!  
> Jk there's still gonna be a couple more chapters to this.
> 
> So if you haven't figured it out by the first chapter and summary this isn't a romance, this is angst. This is a 16 year old kid who fell in love with someone and then it didn’t go well because teenagers are dumb fuck ups. This is a story of someone trying to move on and becoming content that he will never get the person he fell in love with back.
> 
> I've seen and read so many relationships that end up working and they're perfect for each other but I've never read a story about the realistic side of the relationship. The fights, the non-compatible personalities, the aftermath of these relationships, and the moving on or fixes. 
> 
> This IS a vent fanfic (my ex and I have similar personalities to Klance) but this is also a fanfic to show the side effects of the bad parts, the ones where the pairings don't end marrying each other and someone has to deal with the consequences. Some of the things that happen are in fact from what happened in real life and some of them are a little over dramatized or just set up to help me vent this out. So technically say that my break up is a little based on it but not all of it. 
> 
> This is the story of It'll Be Okay, I hope you enjoy it to the very end of it's experience.


End file.
